One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

Last week, I mentioned I was working with a physical therapist. This competent professional works with me twice a week trying to get me to walk a bit by using a walker. This isn’t as easy as it sounds because I had a flare-up a few weeks ago which made my right leg uncooperative. I use a brace for my left leg and have done so for a couple of years. I depend on my better right side to compensate. Well, not to have either leg working properly is proving troublesome.

 After my second session last week, I also had an occupational therapist come in to offer advice on adapting the house for me. She had concerns over my using the shower. So, of course, we worked on different ways to enter and exit safely. By the time both these professionals were done with me, (Friday evening) my body rebelled and my right side lower back went into spasms.

 Now, they say no good deed goes unpunished so after a weekend of misery, I started to reconsider my choice of becoming more physical. My body didn’t work so well before this, but at least I had been mostly happy and always pain free! My rational mind knows to just keep at it and those lazy muscles will strengthen. My irrational mind overrode this thought and I cancelled my session with the PT for today (Tuesday). I need a break, I think, in order to fully recover from this flare-up, or at least until Thursday when she’s scheduled to return to torture me again.

 I was so miserable this past weekend that I went off my diet: I drank soda, ate cookies and devoured some delicious Dove candy miniatures. After that, I couldn’t tell if the spasms were continuing because of muscle overuse or if it my body got sugar-shocked.

I’m in remorse mode now. I’ve gone back to eating healthy. The spasms are almost gone but I won’t think it was because my body got some junk food in it again and became happy again. If I thought that, I would fortify myself with forbidden stuff after every PT visit. No, I can’t do it. It would mean one step forward and too many steps back!

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Overwhelmed By Joy
    Dec 11, 2013 @ 22:45:01

    I tell people I’m a work in progress. It is very hard when both legs have weakness, for sure. You probably made the right call to take a day off. It sounds like you have a lot of tenacity!

    Reply

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